Purpose... quite simply

There is a word used by the girls; one that allows a person to agree with what someone has already said without the need to repeat the same point. They call the process "economy of speech." The word is ECHO.

I moved to Montana to work at a therapeutic boarding school for girls. My desire to learn how our natural environment assists in healing - whether by simply removing toxins from our urban bodies or enlightening our spirit and soul - is what brought me here. I have to say that in my first days alone, in this small town, on the edge of wilderness (quite seriously - it is not uncommon to see a black bear scavenging in yards and a grizzly in the higher altitudes just miles away) I realized that I made this decision quite abruptly. Within four weeks my dog, Sophie, and I were injected into a world we know very little about. I spent the four days it took to get here thinking about this lack of knowledge... how do you dress for negative 20 degrees? how do I keep owls from eating my dog as a midnight snack? will there be tortillas? will there be GOOD tortillas? and what about friends? will I ever be surrounded by such positive people again? can I live in a place with only one bar in town? how does one fend off a bear? can snow boots be stylish and practical? I reminded myself what great "self-awareness" I would develop with so much time alone in the quiet of the woods. I imagined a Barbara Kingsolver-like existence - one in which I chop my own wood, catch my own fish, and shear the wool I'll spin into yarn, then crochet into socks. I envisioned a path of emotional growth as I essentially exiled myself to the woods. With all these questions and doubts and fantasies, I almost completely forgot to think about the job I was brought here to do - provide therapy to teenage girls living in a community built around a belief in nurturance, healthy boundaries, healthy lifestyle, fun, trust, and hope.

I've been here two weeks now and settling in has had its ups and downs - as expected. When at work, however, I feel a sense of purpose and liveliness. I have had the privilege of sitting in on several "circles," which is their word for group therapy. The hope is that I can see the different therapists' styles and get to know the girls so that I may transition more smoothly into my own circles in the future. So far, I am brought to tears at least once each circle. These are not my easy flowing tears of self concern; these are tears of awe and gratitude (and a secret wish that I had been so enlightened at 16!). Who impressed upon these girls the importance of assertiveness, compassion, and community? Who encouraged them to take ownership of the present moment? Where did they gain wisdom beyond their years? The answer is simple... they taught each other. Correction: they are teaching each other.


I always intended to create a blog in order to chronicle this experience, examine the lessons I learn in this new land, and reveal the serenity produced by being in such close proximity to nature. However, I'd be willing to bet that my journey of personal growth will come more from the little community of girls with whom I have the privilege of working than from solitary walks in the wilderness and thoughtful examinations of philosophical books I've always intended to read. I imagine that this growth will come from the moments when I open my mouth and utter echo.